The last time I wrote was in October. The fact that this posting is so abysmally late and being posted in an entirely different decade is testament to the ability of The PGCE to invade a person’s life. And, if I’m not going to blame this entire vanishing act on something else, also testament to how much I have thrown every cell of my being into my new career path. And to how much I am enjoying it. It was strange how the navel gazing of late August and September melted away as I began to think less about my own professional insecurities, self-deprecating jibes vis-à-vis The Dole and the fun and games that came with being unemployed, and more about the job in hand, the What I Do On A Daily Basis, and the living and enjoying of that which I had talked about for so long. After several weeks of late night lesson planning, powerpoint creating, changing every document/presentation into Comic Sans (because ‘kids learn better with that’), early morning scrabbling for thought-provoking news stories for form-time ‘reflection’ and the drinking of literally gallons of coffee, I finally came to a brief standstill at Christmas and realised that I hadn’t written this blog for a while and that I might in fact be so (dare I say it) content, that I had no need to purge myself of awkward feelings of dissatisfaction through the medium of virtual verbal diarrhoea. Rather a nice revelation after a year in the dole swamp (damn, did it again).
Into 2010, and there have been a whole new set of exciting developments, most significantly, the getting of an actual, salary-paying proper job as a French and Spanish teacher in a lovely school in Liverpool, starting this coming September. The prospect of starting this new job is a world away from the frantic job-hunting, dole-seeking post-journalism time I struggled through. Of course, the usual stresses and strains of life as a single late 20-something remain but, suffice to say, things are coming together pretty nicely. And perhaps most importantly, things have shifted significantly enough from how they were back in November 2008 to warrant a renewed blogging effort. It may be a contradiction to say that I had stopped writing because I was so content and that now I am starting up again for exactly the same reason, but that’s kind of what’s happened. I think it just goes in waves.
But before I move on into this year with renewed vigour, I’d just like to belatedly summarise some of the things I learnt about myself back in cobwebbed 2009…:
1. That I’ve still got it; I’m still able to work till 2am and wake up at 7 for work. Thank you university essay crises and stressful journalistic experience – you have served me well.
2. That I CAN shout. I have surprised myself on two occasions with the power of my own voice. Thank you Year 9 boys who won’t stop talking in my lessons for helping to reveal this talent to me.
3. That I still have a love-hate relationship with competitive situations; whilst fiercely competitive, the thought of filling out a job application or going for an interview still renders me jittery, pale-faced and nauseous.
4. That, after a good ten years of moving around the country/Europe in search of the perfect final settling place, the beautiful land of Liverpool is actually where I’d like to lay my roots. Expensive realisation, that.
5. That my accent is still incomprehensible to many people. So far this year, I’ve been from Yorkshire, The South (the whole south, that is..), and Ireland.
6. That, regardless of having just secured a great job and of facing the prospect of having a car of my own in just less than a month and of being on the look-out for a flat of my own, my personal life continues to baffle and irritate me to the point of now being able to say that I did actually join a dating site at the end of last year. And left a month later.
7. That I hate dating sites and vow never again to join up to that relationship circus…which leaves me with…fate. OK, I admit, I’m going to be single forever. Still, at least I’ve got a car now.
No comments:
Post a Comment